she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
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