What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
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