is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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