There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
Randomize
