3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize
