she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
Randomize
