Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Randomize