Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
Randomize
