Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
