I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Randomize
