i need an iv and a liver transplant
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Randomize