Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
Randomize
