So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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