I should be sponsored by Trojan
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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