I think I just saw someone hide a body.
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
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