ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
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