Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
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