I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
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