i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Randomize
