I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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