Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
