You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
Randomize
