if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
