do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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