I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Randomize
