i just wanna soil my oats bro
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
Randomize
