She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize
