Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Randomize
