people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
well, you know. whores of a feather.
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
