Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
Randomize
