Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
