Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
