I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
