Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
