how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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