i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
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