I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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