what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
Randomize
