why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Randomize
