her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Randomize
