So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Randomize
