Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
Randomize