whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize
