Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize
