Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
