Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
Randomize