I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
I need moral support for this bender
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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