I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Randomize
