i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize