what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
I need water and some morals
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Randomize
